Rumors
by rowanashke
Summary: There's a rumor flying around the Leaf Village: Kakashi and Iruka are dating! Iruka's pissed. It's not true. What's going on? No lemonpairing.
1. Chapter 1

Iruka yawned as he shuffled the last of the paperwork from his to-do pile into its proper location. It was almost time to go home; he was looking forward to a fairly calm night. I finally finished grading all those student essays yesterday, we don't have another test for a week, and I don't have to be anywhere. I can finally get started on that novel I've had for the last month…

Feeling virtuous, Iruka rose and stretched. Then he headed out into the main office to check on what was going on.

Namida, Izumo and Kotetsu were huddled together, sniggering about something. Raising his eyebrow, Iruka coughed lightly and saw them jump apart. Namida started blushing, Izumo gave Iruka an odd, thoughtful look, and Kotetsu's grin could have split his head.

"Uh…what's going on?" Iruka crossed his arms over his chest, feeling rather defensive. "What's so funny?"

"Nothing." Namida gave her fellow chuunin a quelling glance and hastily picked up some reports. "I've got to go file these."

"I'll help you." Kotetsu picked up the rest and they ducked into the filing room. Izumo shook his head and started sorting through his own pile.

"Izumo…" Iruka frowned. "Tell me what you guys were talking about."

Izumo gave him a sideways glance and then sighed. He could see the rising anger in Iruka's eyes. It was not really safe to have Iruka pissed at you. Iruka was the master pranker, and his revenges were legendary. "Uh…it's nothing. Just some gossip. Stupid really."

"Really? Then it shouldn't be too bad to pass it along. After all, if it's so funny…"

Izumo's eyes darted to the door. Damn. He was trapped. "Ahh…."

Iruka lowered his chin and glared at Izumo. Finally, Izumo rubbed his chin uneasily and sighed. "Alright, but you have to promise not to get pissed at me."

Iruka sighed in exasperation. "Just tell me already!"

"Look, I don't know where it started, or who started it, but…there's a rumor that…uhm…you and…that you're dating…." Izumo hesitated, and then blurted "That you're dating Hatake Kakashi!"

"WHAT?" Iruka gaped at Izumo, his arms falling to his side in shock. "WHAT???"

"Yeah….uhm. That's the rumor."

"That's….that's…."

"Uh…so you're not?"

"WHAT! I'M NOT GAY!" Iruka screamed. Izumo blanched and pressed himself against the wall, one hand coming up to fend off Iruka.

"I didn't believe it! I don't think you're gay! I didn't even want to tell you about the rumor, but you insisted! Iruka, don't kill me!"

Iruka forced himself to calm down. Taking several long, deep breaths, he took a few steps backward and re-crossed his arms over his chest. After a long moment of fuming silence, he hissed one word.

"Hatake."


	2. Chapter 2

Iruka's hunt for Kakashi was unfruitful; either no one had seen him all day, or no one wanted to tell him. Of course, the look in Iruka's eyes probably warned people that there was going to be trouble. Iruka ended up at the bar, feeling disgruntled and badly in need of a steadying drink.

There was a lot of conversation as he entered; he noted sourly that most of it silenced when they saw him. That damned rumor! When he got his hands on Hatake, he was going to strangle him until his face turned purple!

He sat at the bar, not in the mood for conversation, and ordered sake.

"Hey, Iruka!" Iruka winced when he heard the voice. Greeeat, just what he needed. Anko.

"How are you?" Anko chirped, flopping into the chair next to him. She was quickly followed by Asuma, Guy, Genma and Kurenai.

I'm surrounded by jounin, Iruka thought suddenly. What the hell?

"Sooo. I heard a funny rumor today, Iruka. Seems you and Hatake Kakashi are getting all snuggly?"

"In the Hokage's office, no less. I didn't know you were so naughty!" Genma grinned around his senbon. Kurenai snorted, her eyes dancing merrily.

"WHAT?" Iruka shot out of the stool, his face turning red. "WHAT?"

"Settle down, kid." Asuma put his hand on Iruka's shoulder and forced him to sit back down. "We're just kidding you; none of us believe it. We thought you could use some support." He glared at Genma and Genma blushed slightly, looking ashamed.

"Sorry, Iruka. I couldn't resist."

Iruka unsuccessfully fought his blushes and took a sip of sake. When he'd calmed down a little, he sighed and rubbed the scar across his nose.

"I'd like to find out who started these rumors." Asuma gestured to the bartender for drinks. "They're all around the town. Someone spread them deliberately, I'm thinking."

"Why?" Kurenai took a sip of sake and wrinkled her nose. "What would this person hope to accomplish?"

Genma shrugged. "Trying to make someone jealous? If someone really liked Iruka, and they found out that Kakashi was supposedly squeezing Iruka, then they'd maybe try and get Kakashi. Or vice-versa."

"Whoever did this is completely low." Guy waved away the sake and glared around the room at the crowd. "Using rumor to spread foul lies about a good person like Iruka. Iruka, we'll help you to clear your good name and restore the shining sun of your honor."

Behind him, Genma rolled his eyes and mouthed "Shining sun of your honor." Kurenai turned a snicker into a cough.

Iruka blushed. Having Guy on your side was a double-edged sword, sometimes.


	3. Chapter 3

Iruka stared at his glass, his mind whirling drunkenly through the options. He wondered bleakly if the parents of the kids he taught had heard the rumor. Of course. Everyone in the damn village has heard the rumor. How can I face my class tomorrow? Man, this is so messed up.

"What am I going to do?" Iruka whined. "I mean, if I say it's not true, people will probably just assume I'm trying to cover it up. If I just try and ignore it, people will be sure that it's true since I haven't denied it. So I'm gay any way you look at it, I guess."

Asuma grinned and scratched his beard. "Well…I mean, you could always try it."

"WHAT?" Iruka's head snapped around and he glared at Asuma, feeling his face turning scarlet. "I'm NOT GAY!"

"How do you know, Iruka?" Genma peered at his cards for a moment, then selected two and tossed them on the bar. "Have you ever tried it?"

Iruka felt his blush deepening. "NO." he grated.

"Genma's right." Anko hit a particularly nasty knot and Genma grunted in pain. "Maybe this is your chance?"

"Maybe Kakashi started the rumor." Anko grinned suddenly, looking at Iruka thoughtfully. "Maybe he wanted to see if you were interested, so he started the rumor about your relationship to find out what your reaction would be?"

"If he did…" Iruka coughed, and then restarted. "If he did, I think I'm going to _kill _him. With my bare hands. Slowly."

"Be careful, Iruka." Genma grinned wickedly. "He's a special jounin. Get into a match with him and you might find yourself flat on your back in no time. Maybe that's what he wanted?"

Iruka didn't think he could blush harder. "Shut UP, Genma. That's…"

"Stop it, Genma." Anko kicked at Genma, who dodged and tried to look sorry.

"I repeat-I'm NOT GAY!" Iruka tossed back his sake and slammed the cup onto the bar. "I'm NOT!"

"And I'll repeat myself-how exactly do you know?" Asuma patted Anko's knee and then reached for his sake. "Maybe you should try to date Kakashi, see how it goes…"

Iruka shoved himself upwards, steadying himself with his arms. "I am NOT going to date Hatake Kakashi! I wouldn't date him if he was the last person alive in the village! I don't want him. I'm _not _attracted to him! STOP ASKING ME ABOUT IT!!!!"

Asuma was looking over Iruka's shoulder. Anko's face was pale. Genma was chewing on his senbon with a funny look on his face.

There was a shocked, tense silence in the bar.

"He's…right behind me, isn't he?" Iruka asked into the silence. Asuma's eyebrows lifted and he nodded slowly. Flushing, Iruka considered all his options.

He turned slowly and gave Kakashi a quick, bright smile. "Uh…no offense."

Then he quickly performed the transport jutsu and chickened out.


	4. Chapter 4

Iruka soaped his hair and rubbed it, his mind playing over the events at the bar.

I really just shouted all of that with Kakashi behind me?

I'm a dead man.

He sighed and rinsed his hair, then started to soap his body. Maybe I could take a mission out of the village? For a long time? Maybe a diplomatic position. Or not, he thought flushing. After that mess, there's no way they'd think I was diplomatic enough for that.

"Iruka?"

Iruka yelped and automatically covered himself. For a moment, he stared in shock at the figure that had appeared in his bathroom. It was really hard to make out, but it had sounded like…

"Are you almost done? We need to talk."

It _was _Kakashi. And he sounded _pissed_.

"What the hell are you doing in my _bathroom?_" Iruka yelled.

"Hurry up and finish your shower, Iruka."

Iruka watched the shadowy figure leave. When he heard the door shut, he let out his breath. Then he hurriedly rinsed the soap off and peeked around the curtain to make sure that Kakashi wasn't there and that the bathroom door was closed. Shutting off the water, he tried to figure out what Kakashi was doing here. Was he going to murder him in his own house? Should I try and duck out the window?

He grabbed a towel and dried himself off. Then he realized that he hadn't brought any clothes with him.

Oh shit.

He hesitated a long moment, torn with indecision. But he had a feeling, judging by the sound of Kakashi's voice, that Kakashi wouldn't wait forever for him to finish. And Kakashi was a crazy man, like most jounin. Iruka wouldn't put it past him to come and investigate what was taking Iruka so long to get out of the shower. He didn't have any choice. Swearing under his breath, Iruka wrapped the towel around his waist as securely as he could manage before hesitantly opening the bathroom door.

Kakashi was sitting at the kitchen counter, facing the bathroom door. Making sure I'm not going to bolt, Iruka thought. He felt himself turn a deep shade of scarlet as Kakashi looked him up and down and raised an eyebrow.

Taking a deep breath and drawing his tattered dignity around him as tightly as he could, Iruka stalked to his bedroom and firmly shut the door behind him.


	5. Chapter 5

When Iruka emerged from the bathroom, he saw that Kakashi was still sitting in the same place as before. Taking a deep breath, Iruka walked into the kitchen and grabbed the tea kettle. "Tea?"

Kakashi shook his head. Iruka silently filled the kettle and put it on the stove. Then he turned and faced Kakashi, deciding to take his own life in his hands. "Uh…Kakashi, about what I said in the bar…"

Kakashi sighed and waved his hand. "Forget it. I'm actually relieved to hear it, bruising to my ego as it was. I was afraid that you'd started the rumors. Hearing you shout your indifference to me in a bar full of jounin and chuunin pretty much disproves that theory."

Iruka relaxed. "That's good. I'm sorry, but I'm…straight."

Kakashi laughed soundlessly. "Hmm."

Kakashi can pack a lot into a Hmmm, thought Iruka, blushing. He occupied himself with his tea for a long moment, trying to conquer his blush.

Finally Kakashi sighed. "Well. Since you obviously didn't start the rumor, and I didn't start the rumor, and I'm pretty sure that group of degenerates who were at the bar with you didn't start the rumor…" he gave another long sigh. "That leaves…what? Half the village?"

Iruka echoed his sigh and leaned on the counter. What are we going to do?"

Kakashi shrugged. "Nothing for the time being. We'll let this play out. I have a feeling that it will just go away."

…

Iruka gritted his teeth and reminded himself that children would be children.

"CLASS! PAY ATTENTION!"

His harsh bark startled the class into looking at him, and the look in his eyes warned them that he was at the end of his patience. The class obediently quieted and Iruka got on with the lesson.

After he'd dismissed them, he sank into his chair with a sigh. Gods. It was bad enough to walk into a bar full of adults discussing his love-life; it was much, much worse to walk into a classroom full of eleven to thirteen year olds doing the same thing.

He buried his head in his hands and groaned. And he had to go back to the office tomorrow; maybe he could call in sick?


	6. Chapter 6

Being at the office wasn't as bad as he'd figured. Evidentially Izumo and Kotetsu had heard about his tantrum at the bar and blessedly refrained from further teasing. And the people who drifted in and out of the office were too busy to stop. He'd just begun to relax when Shika, Neji and Hinata came in.

"Hey, Iruka-sensei." Shika handed him their report. "Uh-how are you doing?"

Judging from Hinata's blush, they'd heard the rumors. Iruka groaned and gritted his teeth. "I'm FINE." Iruka snapped.

There was an uncomfortable silence. Finally, Iruka couldn't take it anymore. "WHAT?" He finally asked. Hinata blushed harder.

"Uhm." Shikamaru hastily backed away. "Nothing. Come on, you guys. We should…ah…I mean, we've got to…"

They ducked out the door and Iruka groaned again. Laying his head on the desk, he seriously wished he'd called in sick today.

….

Iruka unlocked his front door and pushed it open. It was dark in his house; he frowned. Did I forget to leave the light on? I know I wasn't thinking much this morning…

Something thrilled along his nerves. Automatically, he pulled a kunai knife from his pouch and froze. Something wasn't right.

He'd come home to many different surprises over the years; students thought it was funny to try and surprise him in his house. But this wasn't one of those times. This was something serious, he could feel it.

Taking a quiet step inside the door, he shut it behind him. The room fell into darkness. Closing his useless eyes, Iruka exerted his chakra to sense out the room, seeking in every corner for something not right, something out of whack…

He reacted before he even realized what he'd sensed; his kunai flashed, meeting a similar stroke. Gasping, he threw himself to the side, assuming a defensive crouch. He froze again, trying to find the attacker.

In the village, Iruka thought with a snarl. In my own damn house! Who is this?

Another attack. Iruka parried it by instinct and then lashed out, trying to find the attacker. Something was keeping him from sensing it with his chakra; it was like the room was blanketed in fog. A chakra inhibiter!

Something hit him from the side. Caught off guard, he felt the knife slice through his sleeve and into his arm. Hissing in surprise, he jerked, only to be hit by something blunt fro the other side. It hit hard, and Iruka felt the bone in his arm crack.

He cried out in pain. Cradling his injured arm, he blindly sought the door handle in the dark. Have to get out of here, have to get help.

Someone's face hovered into the air just in front of Iruka. Iruka gasped. "You!"

Something heavy struck his head and he fell into the darkness in his mind.


	7. Chapter 7

Kakashi yawned, rubbing his face with his hand. His apartment was cold, as usual. He kind of liked it that way. Kicking a blanket out of the middle of the floor (where he'd left it this morning), he wandered to the kitchen to try and find something edible.

Not much in the fridge; some left-over noodles, a half-eaten sandwich. Some milk. Staring at the sandwich, he debated eating it or going out for something.

Someone knocked at his door. Frowning, he slipped the mask back over his face. He padded over and called "who is it?" By long habit, he found a kunai in his hands.

"Iruka. I need to talk to you."

"Iruka?" Kakashi frowned harder. Something didn't sound right. Keeping the kunai in his hand, he opened the door.

Someone shoved it hard. Kakashi managed to side-step to avoid the door, but

something else came flying in the house. A body. He caught it automatically and gasped.

Iruka!

Kakashi looked up, but there was no one at the door. Setting Iruka down gently, he sprang up and peered out into the darkness. Nothing.

He turned and kneeled by Iruka. Someone had taken a blunt object and beaten the crap out of the chuunin. Kakashi checked to make sure he was still alive and then paused to consider the situation.

What the hell is going on, he wondered. Iruka stirred, groaning. Kakashi carefully lifted him, turning him onto his back.

"'Kashi?" Iruka asked blearily. Kakashi nodded, and then cleared his throat. "I'm here, Iruka. Who the hell beat you up?"

Iruka muttered something. Kakashi ground his teeth in frustration. "Iruka, I'm taking you to the hospital. Hold on."

Suddenly Kakashi's door slammed open. Kakashi dropped Iruka, wincing mentally at the thump his body made hitting the floor. Whirling, he drew his kunai and…

…froze. It was three ANBU black ops

"Hatake Kakashi, freeze. Make one move and we'll take you out." The lead operative's voice was low and calm; Kakashi mentally congratulated him on his balls. He was probably shaking in his shoes.

"Iruka needs to get to a hospital." Kakashi stood slowly, spreading his hands out to show he wasn't armed. "Hurry. Someone beat him up and threw him through my door."

"Step away from him." Kakashi sighed and slowly stepped from Iruka. One of the ANBU slid up to him, gathered him in his arms, and disappeared. Well, that's that, Kakashi thought in relief. Now for this.

"Come with us." The ANBU gestured out the door. "No tricks."

"Ok." Kakashi let them take his arm and walk him down the street.


	8. Chapter 8

Tsunade stared at the ANBU operative as he made his report. Kakashi, standing in a circle of ANBU, rolled his eyes.

"…received an anonymous tip that Hatake threatened to kill Umino. There was a report of Umino heading for Hatake's place. We arrived to find Hatake kneeling over Umino's body. Umino's been taken to the hospital; he's been beaten very badly and is in critical condition, but the medics say he'll be fine with some rest."

"Hmmm." Tsunade sighed and shook her head. "Fine. That's all. You can leave."

"…L..lady Hokage…" the ANBU actually stuttered in his surprise.

"I said go. Like I can't handle one idiot jounin. Go, go."

The ANBU hesitated, but a direct order was a direct order. Giving Hatake a dubious glance, he and his fellow operatives left, shutting the door rather hard behind him.

Tsunade sighed and rubbed her forehead. Gesturing to a chair, she settled back and gave him a troubled look. "What's going on, Kakashi?"

Kakashi sat down and outlined the whole deal, starting from his first encounter with the strange rumor and ending with Iruka being thrown into his arms. Tsnuade looked grim.

"Whatever this is, it's serious now. Iruka could have been killed. What the hell is going on?"

Kakashi rubbed his chin thoughtfully, staring out of the window. "If you bought the report that the ANBU gave you, what would happen?"

Tsunade shrugged. "If you didn't get lynched by the villagers or your fellow ninja? You'd probably be thrown in prison. But you'd most likely be the target of some attacks of retribution.

Kakashi nodded. "Exactly." He sat up, folding his hands in front of him. "Everyone would hate me. Iruka's pretty well loved, isn't he?"

Tsunade nodded. "Yeah. I get it." She frowned, anger sparking in her eyes. "So you think this is all just some set-up to get you killed?"

"Hated, killed, thrown out of the village…" Kakashi shrugged. "I've made a lot of enemies in my life. Not all of them were outside of this village, either. Maybe someone just wants to see me brought down."

"Damn." Tsunade thought deeply for a moment. "Iruka!" She slammed her hand on the table, standing. "If they really want to get you, they're going to have to finish what they started. Iruka knows who attacked him. If he wakes up and tells everyone, the scheme is done. Iruka is in danger!"

Kakashi stood with her. "So he is."

Tsunade sighed. "We're going to have to use him as bait. Poor Iruka."

Kakashi opened the door for her. "We'll just have to make sure nothing happens to him, won't we?"

…

_The shadows congealed; a figure stepped from the corner. Drawing a long knife, the figure positioned itself beside Iruka's bed. With a sigh, it shook its head and whispered "Sorry about this, Iruka-sensei." Then the figure lifted its hand…_

_…and stabbed down._


	9. Chapter 9

Iruka's hands slammed up, catching the knife in mid-swing. Gaping, the figure stumbled backwards, trying to pull the knife out of Iruka's hands…

…right into Kakashi's waiting arms. Snarling, Kakashi seized the cloaked figure and slammed it sideways into the wall. The figure dropped the knife and collapsed, groaning.

Iruka sat up and then shimmered. Tsunade, looking grimly pleased, appeared in his place. "Nice catch, Kakashi."

Kakashi grunted and reached down to reveal the figure.

"Who the hell is that?" Tsunade swung her legs out of bed and stood, staring down at the revealed attacker.

Kakashi crossed his arms over his chest, pondering the hunched figure. "Huh. I thought you were dead." He said eventually. The figure twitched and turned to snarl at Kakashi.

"I am! You killed me, you bastard. It's your fault. Everything's your fault. If it wasn't for you, I'd still be a jounin, still be part of everything." The man's voice became a whine, reedy and mad. But because of you I'm lost; I have no home, no family, no one to love me. Because of you…"

"Bullshit." Kakashi said in disgust. "You deserved what you got, you piece of trash."

"Enlighten me." Tsunade scratched her leg and then leaned back, looking at the man curiously.

"This is Yurinde Kawabata. He was a chuunin of the leaf village when I was still in ANBU. He was sent on a mission with two other chuunin; he came back alone. He _said_ his teammates had been killed by enemy ninja. Instead, I found them barely alive, trapped under a rockslide. His teammates told me that he had triggered the landslide himself and left them to die because, and I quote, 'they had mocked him for the last time.' One of the men lost his leg. He had a record of fighting and, after the fact, it came out that he was probably responsible for the death of one of his genin teammates as well." Kakashi looked down at the cowering figure in disgust. "We took him into custody, but before anything could be done, he somehow managed to escape. Killed two chuunin guards on his way out of the village. ANBU tracked him for two weeks, but the trail ended in a nasty bar in Sand country. There was a huge fight in progress. Afterwards, when they'd sorted out the wounded and dead, we found what we thought was his body. We thought he'd been killed."

Tsunade looked grim. "He's clearly mad. He'll have to be evaluated." She stood and walked to the door. Opening it, she gestured for the ANBU operatives to enter. "Take him."

Kakashi sighed and leaned on the wall. "Well, that's done."

…

Kakashi gratefully opened the door to his house. Then he froze.

Genma, Kurenai and Anko were standing in a group in the middle of his living room, glaring at him. Kakashi wildly wondered where Asuma was…

…until he felt Asuma's hands grab his shoulders.

He had time for one frantic swearword before Asuma pushed him forward into the group. Anko kicked him in the shins; Kurenai slammed him in the back. He collapsed, and Genma slid on top of him. Kakashi felt the prick of Genma's senbon on the exposed back of his neck.

I'm a dead man, he thought frantically.

"HOLD IT!"

Tsunade! I'm saved! Kakashi thought wildly.

Tsunade stalked into the room. "Let him up."

"But Lady Hokage…" Anko took a step forward, but Tsunade warningly shook her finger. "Let. Him. Up."

Genma swore and Kakashi felt the pressure let off. Tsunade reached down and hauled him up. "Ok, ok. Calm down, everyone. Let's get this sorted out."

…

Much later, Kakashi waved goodbye to Genma, the last to leave. Shutting the door quietly, he chuckled to himself as he began to straighten his apartment.

Strange day, he mused.


	10. Chapter 10

Iruka woke slowly, blinking against the sunlight. Turning his head slowly, he saw Kakashi sprawled out in the chair, reading his book.

"Hey." Iruka licked his lips. "Did you catch him?"

Kakashi closed his book and sat up. "Yes. He's taken care of now."

"Good." Iruka closed his eyes. "So everyone knows…it was just a rumor?"

"Yes." Kakashi slipped his book into his pockets. "It's all sorted out. By the way, Naruto was here earlier. He'll probably stop by again."

"Thanks for the warning." Iruka grinned.

They sat in companionable silence for a moment. Then Iruka opened his eyes. "Kakashi?"

"Hmm?" Kakashi asked.

"Uhm. When I get out of the hospital, you want to…maybe go get ramen some time?"

Kakashi looked at Iruka for a long moment. "Iruka…are you hitting on me?"

Kakashi wondered if blushing that hard hurt, with all those bruises.

"NO!" Iruka yelled.

Good lungs for someone lying flat on his back in a hospital room, Kakashi thought with amusement.

"I just…I just thought…" Iruka floundered.

Kakashi considered continuing the joke, but he reluctantly decided to take pity on the poor kid. "I know. I was just kidding, Iruka. Yes, I would like to have ramen with you when you get out of the hospital."

Iruka closed his eyes and sighed. "Good. Now go away so I can get some sleep."

Kakashi laughed and stood. As he left, he looked back and grinned.

"Bye, sweetheart."

"KAKASHI!"


End file.
